


The Glitch That Didn't Crash The New Year

by orchidlocked



Category: Good Omens (Radio), Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Aziraphale Has a Vulva (Good Omens), Bottom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Brief Mention of Edging, Crowley Has Two Penises (Good Omens), Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens), Enthusiastic Consent, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Kink, Light Mentions of Kink, Love Confessions, M/M, Marathon Sex, Multiple Orgasms, New Year's Eve, Other, Service Top Crowley (Good Omens), Top Crowley (Good Omens), World doesn't end, Zine: Love and Lust Through the Ages (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 03:34:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29146737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orchidlocked/pseuds/orchidlocked
Summary: It's New Year's Eve, 1999. Aziraphale and Crowley have heard that it might be The Arma-you-know-what. Before the End of the World, Aziraphale has a laundry list of things he'd like to try out. Virtually plot-free.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 105
Collections: Love and Lust Through the Ages Volume II, Top Crowley Library





	The Glitch That Didn't Crash The New Year

**Author's Note:**

> One of my pieces for the amazing Love & Lust Through the Ages, Volume 2!

31 December 1999

Crowley had been rushing around all day, and due to traffic and crowds, he was already a half hour late for their rendezvous. He barged into the hotel room with a scowl. Aziraphale was standing next to the window, an open book on the desk next to him.

“Well, hello.”

“Hell of a day for what could be the last one. Have you caught a look out there? It’s packed, bloody packed. Sardines,” Crowley grumbled, and Aziraphale was instantly overwhelmed by fondness.

“Do you, ah – did you have any trouble finding, well, I suppose you wouldn’t have had any trouble with any of it,” Aziraphale let out a high-pitched laugh, “that’s, of course that would be the whole point of it, now wouldn’t it?”

Crowley noted the angel’s furrowed brow and rapidly fluttering eyelashes. “The end of the world and you’re embarrassed about this?” he asked.

“Well… I – I guess when you put it that way.”

“I said I was completely down.”

“Down?”

“I’m interested, I’m ready, I’ll do whatever you want.” Crowley set a large suitcase on the dresser.

Aziraphale exhaled and perched on the edge of the bed. “I’m just glad we can spend it together.”

Crowley tilted his head, then leaned in and kissed Aziraphale on the forehead. “Nowhere else I’d rather be, Angel.” He slipped his sunglasses off and set them on the bedside table.

“It’s funny, I-“ Aziraphale chuckled, “-I suppose I’m just a teensy bit nervous.” He began slowly unbuttoning his baby blue shirt.

“Oh, no need for that.” Crowley kicked off his boots, then worked his belt free. “Not turned off by any of it, I mean it,” he said as he peeled off his tight trousers.

“You really aren’t?” Aziraphale looked truly mortified; he was flushed all the way down to the middle of his chest.

Crowley got on his knees. “Not at all. I get why you’d – I don’t lie to you, Angel. Never have.”

Aziraphale was sufficiently convinced by Crowley’s sincerity; his shoulders finally relaxed, and he continued removing his clothing. “I do so appreciate it, dear.”

“It’s no bother. When do you want to, um, you know…”

Aziraphale glanced at the clock. “Half past nine. Funny, if it wasn’t the end of the world, I’d propose we go out for a little something.” He cupped Crowley’s face with his hand. “Well, I suppose we could start… now?”

“All right.” Crowley slipped off his shirt, then began rummaging around in his suitcase. He was clad in only black pants and black socks, and Aziraphale traced the lines of his shoulders down to the divots at the small of his back, then over his shapely legs and well-defined calves. It wasn’t long before his roiling anxiety gave way to a welcomed warmth at his core. Crowley turned around with a familiar grin, his cock starting to thicken against his thigh, walking towards Aziraphale with a swagger in his step. He pulled his hands out from behind his back, a blindfold in one, a paddle in the other.

“What do you want first, Angel?”

Aziraphale’s mouth had gone dry. “The blindfold.”

“The blindfold what?” Crowley snapped his fingers and the blindfold was on Aziraphale, perfectly tied, rendering his sight useless.

“The blindfold, please,” Aziraphale stammered out.

“That’s right. Naughty angels have to ask for what they want, isn’t that right? Get on your hands and knees.” Crowley’s voice had dropped half an octave, and Aziraphale felt his clit twitch as he shifted into position. He let out a gasp as Crowley brought the paddle down hard on his backside. “Isn’t that right?”

“Yes.”

Crowley smacked Aziraphale on the other cheek, and started slowly running his fingers up the inside of Aziraphale’s thighs, stopping only once he got to the wet spot on the outside of the angel’s white lace panties. “You like this, yeah?” he asked in a whisper.

“Yes, Crowley, very much so.”

“Did you really want to try everything on that list?”

Aziraphale gulped. He tried to speak, but a high-pitched squeak was all that came out.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yes.”

“Everything’s all right so far?”

“Oh, yes.”

“And how will you tell me if it’s not?”

“Red, yellow, green,” Aziraphale said quietly.

“All right.” Aziraphale yelped as Crowley smacked his arse.

Crowley had memorized the list Aziraphale had given him months ago; he’d barely been able to make it home without a wank after the angel slipped him the piece of paper with the dozen or so things he “wanted to try before the end of the world.” As the day grew close, Crowley couldn’t believe his luck. His Side wasn’t convinced that this was Armegeddon, but he managed to get the day off anyways. If it was the end of the world, he reasoned, how better to go out than deep inside Aziraphale?

Crowley manhandled Aziraphale, fucked him up against the wall as Aziraphale clung to Crowley’s neck, scratched red lines down his back. He laid a panting, sweaty Aziraphale back down on the bed, tied him up with black ropes and teased orgasm after orgasm out of the angel while he helplessly whimpered and soaked the bed beneath him. A few hours in, Aziraphale asked politely for a glass of water, so Crowley sat him up, lifted a cup to his lips, then went back to checking off the list. He had just brought Aziraphale to the edge of an orgasm only to back off at the last minute when the angel quietly said “yellow.”

Aziraphale was on his lap; Crowley snaked his arms around the angel’s stomach and chest, held him tightly. “You okay?”

“Crowley, haven’t we – it surely feels like it’s been a bit longer than just two hours,” Aziraphale gasped, his chest heaving.

Crowley let out a low laugh. “Oh, time’s a flexible concept, thought you of all people would know that, Angel. Need a break?”

“Uh – well, um – no.” Aziraphale gasped and his hips started jerking as Crowley placed the vibrator back against his clit. “Oh,” he sputtered out as he gripped Crowley’s arms, coming yet again on his still-hard cock.

“Go on, Angel, let yourself go.”

Aziraphale cried out in pleasure, and Crowley kept slowly thrusting up into him until his entire body went limp. He gave the angel a few moments of rest before flipping him onto his back and diving tongue-first into his thighs.

But even with all the demonic powers at his behest, Crowley could only hold time back so long, and soon, the hour grew close. Crowley had Aziraphale laid out flat on the desk, fucking into him leisurely while occasionally sneaking a glance at the crowds of revelers in the streets below.

Aziraphale spoke when the possible end of civilization was about a half hour away. “Crowley, could you – would you-“ he trailed off and motioned for Crowley to bend down so he could whisper into his ear.

Crowley’s mouth went dry. “You sure you want that, Angel?”

Aziraphale nodded. “Please,” he begged with that familiar look on his face, and Crowley had never been able to deny him a thing; that’s how they’d ended up here all those years ago.

“All right.” Crowley stepped back and helped him up. “Turn over.”

Aziraphale stood and brushed his bare chest off in the same prim way he’d adjust the buttons of his waistcoat; a sight that caused Crowley to feel something warm burbling up in his chest. “I’m ready,” he said after he bent over the desk.

Crowley gently smacked Aziraphale’s arse and let out a deep breath. He wasn’t experienced in this sort of magic, but for Aziraphale? He closed his eyes and focused on changing his corporation in the requested way.

“Are you ready, dear?”

“Um. Yeah.” Crowley stared down at his newly transformed self and was about to take himself in hand when Aziraphale reached back and did it for him, grabbing his lower cock and returning it to where it had been for the past hour.

Aziraphale let out a blissful sigh that nearly ended Crowley. “I’m ready for um – the ah – for the rest of you.”

“Give me a second.” Crowley slowly opened Aziraphale up with his long fingers.

“Please, Crowley. We only have a few minutes.”

“Well, it isn’t like I’ve done this before, Angel,” Crowley hissed. He didn’t even bother to check the clock before slowly guiding the head of his upper cock past the tight ring of muscle and deep into Aziraphale. “Oh holy hell, Angel,” he sputtered out once he was finally fully seated.

“Why we didn’t do this sooner, I’ll never know,” Aziraphale muttered to himself.

“What’d you say?”

“Nothing.” Aziraphale reached back and laced his fingers with Crowley’s. “Please, my dear.”

Crowley sucked in a deep breath and adjusted his angle so he could fuck Aziraphale the way he’d envisioned doing it at the end of the world.

“Oh, yes,” Aziraphale continued letting out his lovely little squeaks and moans of pleasure as the new year officially began, the noise of the crowd followed closely by the flashes and pops from fireworks shooting off. They waited as they watched. It was one minute past midnight, then two, then five, Crowley still pounding into Aziraphale with both cocks, his slender fingers gripping Aziraphale’s hips so hard the angel felt a pulse of heat under each point of contact. When the clock said ten after, Crowley let out a particularly loud groan and then stilled. His corporation was a bit out of shape for this type of marathon; he noted the rivulets of sweat running down his chest, down to where his hips connected with Aziraphale’s arse. “You all right there, Angel?” Crowley asked, his voice hoarse.

“I guess I am all right,” Aziraphale said. He pushed up from the desk and off of Crowley. “It’s all fine. The world didn’t end after all.” The rosy-cheeked angel laughed joyfully, then threw himself into Crowley’s embrace. “Thank goodness.”

“Indeed.” Crowley tightened his arms around the angel, kissed Aziraphale’s neck, his temple, the curls on top of his head. When he finally met Aziraphale’s eyes again, the angel was blushing furiously, all the way up to the tips of his ears. Crowley barked out a laugh. “Oh, Angel,” he said before ruffling Aziraphale’s already-mussed hair and gazing at him fondly.

“You wouldn’t mind if we made this particular, um, this - part of the usual routine, would you, my dear?” Aziraphale asked, gracefully waving his hand to what Crowley correctly assumed was the lower half of his body.

“Absolutely not,” Crowley said. He hesitated for a split second before kissing Aziraphale furiously. “I’m really glad it’s not the end of the world,” he murmured into Aziraphale’s ear.

“As am I, my dearest, as am I.” Aziraphale’s kisses grew more and more insistent. The angel’s hands wandered down Crowley’s torso, and he eventually took both of Crowley’s cocks in hand and watched as they hardened under his touch. “Oh, well isn’t that lovely,” Aziraphale said. “Would you mind terribly if I asked you to pick up where we left off?”

“Anything you want, Angel.” Aziraphale flashed Crowley a cheeky grin and turned around. He grabbed Crowley’s lower cock and practically impaled himself on it while the demon carefully slipped his upper cock back inside. Once he was fully seated, he let out a low moan of pleasure. “Oh, Angel, I’m gonna – ngk –“

“We’re so lucky, we missed the end of the world,” Aziraphale said, tightening his grip on the edges of the desk.

“Nothing happened.” Crowley slammed into Aziraphale with a particularly hard thrust and the angel cried out in pleasure.

“So that means - oh! - we can keep, well if you’d like, of course that is, it is a - ah! - new millennium after all, I don’t know if you were hoping to leave these activities behind as-“

“You think I want to stop fucking you, Angel?” Crowley’s voice was sharp, irritated, and good Heavens, did it turn Aziraphale on.

“Crowley!”

Crowley laughed, caressed the fat over Aziraphale’s hips. “Right, right, excuse me. Dost thou believeth I would ever desire to cease making love to thee?” His tone was sibilant, sarcastic.

Aziraphale turned his head around slowly; so slowly. “What did you say?” he asked Crowley with a glint in his eyes.

Crowley’s hips came to a stop as he realized exactly what he’d said. Of course he wasn’t going to take it back, or some bonehead move, but-

A series of sounds of varying pitch left Crowley’s mouth, and if he didn’t know better, he’d have described the smile that crept onto Aziraphale’s face as downright devious. He leaned forward and buried his face in the crook of Aziraphale’s neck.

“I love you, too,” Aziraphale whispered against Crowley’s cheek, which was now rapidly turning a shade of deep red.

“Yeah,” Crowley said. He spread his hands over Aziraphale’s belly. “Love you.”

“All right, back to it.” Aziraphale flopped down onto Crowley’s desk and tossed his head over his shoulder. “I believe you were in the middle of ‘fucking my brains out.’” He winked before pushing back against Crowley.

“You really shouldn’t be allowed to wiggle like that,” Crowley said before smacking Aziraphale on the arse and grabbing a thick handful of angel. “Downright obscene.”

“Obscene! Ha!” Aziraphale tittered. He licked his lips, looked Crowley up and down. “You haven’t seen the half of it. Perhaps I’ll share the rest of the list with you before too long.”

Crowley blinked, raised an eyebrow, and then resumed his motions; fucking Aziraphale right into a new millennium.


End file.
